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Home Advice Ask Miss Smartypants - October 5, 2009

Ask Miss Smartypants - October 5, 2009

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Written by Miss Smartypants   
Monday, 05 October 2009 00:00
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Dear Miss Smartypants,

So, what is your take on dating in the business/work environment given that people are not finding mates in High School/University as they did generations ago? What does it take to meet people outside of the work environment?

Lonely Boy

Dear Hey There Lonely Boy,

What's my take on dating in the business/work environment? What's your HR department's take on it? I've worked with married couples and I've worked with employers who out-and-out told us not to date each other. Each employer approaches the situation differently. As for whether or not you should, it's understandable that you would want to. Much like when you were school, you have at least one thing in common with the people at work. A couple of pointers:

  • Date outside your immediate unit. You're going to call too much attention to yourselves making moon eyes in staff meetings, and you're going to make everyone in said meetings uncomfortable if you break up.
  • Don't pursue someone at the office as ardently as you might someone outside work. Again, you have to be cognizant that romantic entanglements in the workplace are going to make some people uncomfortable.
  • Don't take office flirtations too seriously. By all means, ask someone out for after work dinner or drinks if you want to, but don't be surprised, like our young gentleman last week, if office flirtation is as far as it was ever meant to go. At least you got some practice flirting in!

As for meeting someone outside work, it takes leaving work. Do things that interest you. Do things that are new for you. Take a class, learn a sport, get a hobby. Tell your friends, single and taken, that you are interested in meeting someone. Try online dating. I've known those who've had luck with Lavalife and Plenty of Fish, but there are many, many others out there. Find a website or three that looks good to you, be honest about who you are, and click away. Otherwise, just concentrate on being yourself and having a good time. Eventually the rest will fall into place.

Hopefully,

Miss Smartypants

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