RuPaul's Drag Race: You Gotta Be Authentic!

Last week, Phoenix went home and there was drama because Mimi Imfurst thought that she was awesome, when really, she is just kind of annoying. Good times!

We start today with a mini challenge, which I am just going to sum up in a few lines because no one cares about them. The ladies have to create a fashion leotard out of only duct tape. The three plus sized queens team up together (Mimi, Delta and Stacy Layne). They barely get any tape over their big bones, and Delta and Stacy don’t really want to be with Mimi. Manila and Carmen win.

The real challenge this week is to create an inspirational workout video. The two winners pick teams.

Manila’s team is Raja, Mimi, Shangela, Stacy Layne, and Alexis. Highlights from their taping include Shangela being funny and not annoying, And Alexis being cute with  a lip-gloss inspired workout. Lowlights include Raja’s weird man voice and Mimi.

Carmen’s team consists of Delta, India, Yara, Mariah. Carmen starts things off at the shoot and it is very awkward. She is sort of ordering people around and Ru is just looking at her like she is crazy. India is wearing scary makeup. Yara is pretty funny and explains that there will be a translation of her spanglish at the end of the video. Delta overcomes her body image stuff and pulls out a pretty good shake weight segment.

The ladies are heading to the mainstage in outfits that feature their favorite body parts. Oh boy. The guest judges this week are Billy B (a makeup artist), Susan Powder, who helped the girls at their filming as well, and Latoya Jackson.

Raja is up first and shows off her wicked legs.

Manila Luzon shows off her face in a somewhat frightening Cruella DeVille ensemble.

Stacy Layne Mathews chooses to highlight her chest, which she claims are huge, but look kind of small, proportionally speaking. Ms. Ru says she works the R&B (Rear and Boobs).

India Ferrah goes for just showing her whole body in a “see-through cat suit”. She has taped Xs over her nips.

Alexis Mateo is also choosing to highlight “everything”, but mostly her hips looks amazing in her dress.

Mimi Imfurst doesn’t tell us what she is showing off and I have no guesses. She claims to be doing a “high camp” and glamour look, but it is just a fairly ugly leopard-print dress.

Shangela highlights her shoulders and has a very cute overcoat that she starts on the stage with, which she drops to reveal a cute miniskirt. She looks great and I am starting to dislike her less.

Mariah is up next and we don’t know what she is highlighting either. She looks nice in the brown cape, though.

Delta Work is apparently highlighting her cans, but I am just really distracted by her round middle. The super clingly hourglass dress does not flatter her shape in the least.

Yara Sofia is highlighting her legs, but Raja did it way better. She really has to lose those frightening contacts…they are the worst.

Carmen Carrera wisely chose to cover up her body (wisely because she has been showing ass at every mainstage so far, and the judges were already tired of it). She is wearing a classic silver evening gown.

The Top 3 are Alexis Mateo, Stacy Layne, and Yara.

The Bottom 3 are Mimi Imfurst. India Ferrah, and Mariah. (Or at least I am guessing this is how it is…I don’t really know because they criticized Yara and Stacy Layne too).

India Ferrah and Mimi Imfurst are the bottom two and they will have to lip sync for their LIIIIIIIIIIIIIVES! They are sync-ing to a song I don’t know, “Don’t Leave me this Way” by Thelma Houston. Yikes! Things get crazy during the sync-ing, and at one point, Mimi picks up India (against her will) and carries her around. It is awkward. At the end of the song, India pulls out some gymnastics and then her boobs are all wonky.

Mimi is told to Sashay, Away. Thank goodness. She was annoying.

More Fabulousness

• Quote of the week goes to Miss Stacy Layne “I kind of realized that if this was a workout challenge, they were going to leave the big bitch behind”. Props to the girl for not caring what those bitches thought.
• Ok, there are too many good quotes this week. “Just be careful jumping rope in heels—safety first”, Mr. RuPaul advises this with a completely straight face and tone.
• Shangela to Stacy Layne: “You eat that chicken, bitch!” (in a complimentary way).
• I have no idea who Susan Powder is.
• Obviously, she still looked fabulous, but I was a bit disappointed with Ms. Ru at the mainstage this week. Usually she takes my breath away, but this time it was more like “Oh, there is a very beautiful woman”. For her, this is a bit of a let down. I think I prefer her fabulous curly hair to the straightened.
• “Nothing tastes as good as skinny feels” – I know that Ms. RuPaul is gorgeous, but on this point we disagree. Has she ever had double stuff oreos? Because they are awesome.
• Alexis Mateo really grew on me this week. She is cute and she looked gorgeous on the mainstage.
• “They call this Queen Mariah”. Um. Did RuPaul just give me a fucking Paint your Wagon reference? Fuck yes, she did. Please can we be friends, Ru? Please. I love myself, so I can love you too, I swear!
• Last word goes to Taryn again, “Bitch gotta be authentic and not a crazy ‘actor’ to be fabulous. Also, she totally ended up looking like a dude in drag, which is for sure not up to Ms. RuPaul’s standards”.

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