Supernatural: THAT’s How They Did It
|Written by April Yorke|
|Wednesday, 21 April 2010 14:59|
N.B. Extreme delay in publication due to technical issues.
Since “99 Problems” let us know that Dean was off to say yes to Michael, I spent the next week wondering when, how, and for what reason Dean would end up saying no in “Point of No Return.” And since I’m kind of sick of Dean lately anyway and I’ve always loved Castiel, imagine my delight in discovering that mainly, Cass was not having it.
Dean’s writing suicide notes and drinking iced tea off in some isolated motel when Sam finds him. Dean, hilariously, is not as crafty as he thinks he is. Since Dean’s not about to abandon his plan, he suggests that he and Sam throw down over it, further adding that Sam’s unlikely to win this time without the help of demon blood (note: this is the first of many verbal slaps between the brothers, so, if genuine animosity between the two of them is like an knife in your heart as it is mine, this episode must have hurt). Fortunately, Sam remembered that he sucks at hand-to-hand, so he has Castiel zap Dean back to Bobby’s place.
There’s a lot of ballyhoo at Bobby’s about how it’s not like they have a better plan anyway (dudes, I already gave you one, but the seeds of another are sown in this ep), but things take a decidedly ugly turn when Bobby calls Dean son, and Dean explodes that Bobby is not his father. THAT IS ENOUGH. That’s just it. You DO NOT yell at Bobby. Bobby who does nothing but help you and take care of you and get paralyzed for you and doesn’t kill himself because you asked him to keep on truckin’ for your sake. STFU Dean, and STFU writers who think that I have already forgotten that just a few weeks ago Dean said Bobby was the closest thing he had to a dad. And considering the hellish spectre that his father was, you should be so lucky.
And that hellish spectre comes to the fore when Castiel sense a disturbance in the angel-force, zaps himself (?) to the woods, takes on and kills two low-level angels (you know they’re low-level because of their plain suits) (also, badass!), and hauls Adam Milligan (Jake Abel) out of the dirt. Oh, you know Sam and Dean’s half brother from “Jump the Shark” that was featured heavily in the previouslies? Turns out he cut a deal with Zechariah (who, in turn, cut a deal with Michael to avoid termination in a truly well-executed bar scene) to serve as Michael’s meat suit in exchange for joining his heaven up with his mom’s. Natch, Dean and Sam have some problems with this, but Dean’s are “no, I’m going to the prom with Michael,” while Sam’s are “I’m not really as down with the Apocalypse as you both are.” So they’ve got two brothers itching to get out, which means that Zechariah swoops Adam up to heaven’s green room and Dean angel-be-gones Castiel (!) in order to escape from Bobby’s Panic Room.* Before that, Dean manages to send some more pain his brother’s way, this time made worse by how matter of factly he tells Sam that he’s saying yes because Sam’s too weak to keep saying no for much longer. It’s rough. Sam nearly cries.
Dean’s plan, hilariously, is to stand next to the first street corner preacher he comes across until Zechariah shows up. Unfortunately for Dean -- and I do mean unfortunately -- Castiel shows up first in order deliver a righteous beat down (yes! Badass!). As you can imagine, rebelling against heaven isn’t exactly easy, and Cass thought he was doing it for a better breed than a quitter like Dean. One alley way beat down later, Cass hauls Dean’s ass back to the panic room, from whence Sam decides to spring him for Operation Rescue Adam. Everyone else thinks College Boy’s plans indicates he’s got bricks for brains, but Sam’s decided to rely not on his head but his heart. Yup, Sam believes that in the end Dean won’t accept Michael’s offer even after Dean tells him repeatedly to his face that yes is the only answer. Hmm.
Green room, Van Nuys, CA: cheeseburgers, beer, Adam, Zechariah. Castiel gets them in by carving an angel-be-gone sigil into his own chest (BADASS!) to clear the five angel guards, Sam fails to smite Zechariah with one of Cass’ two angel-killing scimitars, Dean lets Zechariah know he will say yes after a few conditions are met. Those conditions appear to be reduced to not killing Sam and Adam, who are now fully puking up blood. And while no one gets teary quite like Jensen Ackles and it’s not like he doesn’t sell the scene, but are you kidding me, writers? Do you think I forgot the season opener when Zechariah helped himself to Sam’s lungs, and Dean still said no? Sam can’t die, Zechariah has a vested interested in keeping him alive, and Adam’s already dead. I don’t care how worn down he is, the Dean I know and love would have pulled out some of that false braggadocio, sat down, and taken a big bite of cheeseburger. Because we all know that without the Winchesters, Armageddon is most assuredly not on. At the last possible second, while Zechariah is incanting Michael on down, Dean shoots Sammy a wink, grabs the scimitar, and smites Zechariah. YES! The place is set to blow with archangel-fury, but Adam doesn’t make it out with Sam and Dean. I’m guessing that this means that we could see him again.
In the dénouement, driving a stolen car hopefully back to wherever the Metallicar was sadly abandoned (and you’d think such a sweet ride would get stolen since it is so frequently abandoned), Dean lets Sammy know that if his not-so-little brother believes in him, he’s decided he ought to return the favour by believing in himself. So, are you going to take me up on my offer? If not, you have an angel-killing scimitar of your very own now.
Also, props to Abel. The wardrobe and hair people hit the Dean resemblance pretty hard, but it was actually his matching muted Texan accent that made him feel like a real Winchester.
*I started singing “panic room” to the tune of the Fabric Land jingle. The Panic Room totally deserves its own theme.
|Last Updated on Wednesday, 21 April 2010 10:43|