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|Written by Roxy Munro|
|Friday, 01 October 2010 00:00|
For many Canadians, feeling constantly busy has become a lifestyle norm. Many people are juggling school, work, relationships, families, social activities, and any number of other responsibilities and commitments. For those in the paid workforce, it's typical to be working longer hours than in years past. In fact, according to HRSDC, more than 1.25 million Canadians reported working 50 hours per week or more in 2003, which represents a substantial jump over the previous 10 years.
Given the various roles Canadians play - workers, caregivers, spouses/partners, volunteers, and friends - it makes sense that we're feeling overwhelmed. The Canadian Mental Health Association found that over half of Canadians (58%) report "overload" with their many roles. The challenge of such overload is particularly burdensome for women, who tend to take on the bulk of domestic and care-giving duties in the home.
With such hectic lifestyles and strenuous daily demands, it can seem like a wonder that people find time for sexual activity with their partners and lovers. Making time for sex is an important aspect of achieving life balance, especially since sex is beneficial for our general health and well-being. Sex can reduce stress, boost immunity, and improve self-esteem. Sex is also important for strengthening relationships. Nonetheless, busy people with busy lives are inevitably going to face challenges finding time for sex. In response, there are plenty of ways to keep life sexy when there's no opportunity for sex in your relationship.
Underrated, kissing is an activity that can keep passion alive. It takes considerably less time and effort than other sexual activities, and it can be done just about anywhere, at any time, without consequence. Whether it's to say goodbye as you rush out the door or to greet a lover after a long day of work, a kiss can be a sumptuous way to make an intimate, physical connection during an otherwise exhausting day. Kissing has other benefits, too. Kissing is a stress reliever since it releases endorphins, the chemicals that counteract stress and depression. So, a quick smooch can serve as both a mood-booster and a turn-on.
Massaging is another option that necessitates some close body contact. Unlike kissing, it requires more time and the appropriate space, but it's often just what the overworked and overwhelmed need to unwind. Touch is central to massage, which creates feelings of connectedness. The body's many erogenous zones eroticise massages, making them sexy, even if they don't lead to any sex. Massages, like kissing, are also useful for stress relief and can enhance general well-being.
Maintaining sexual excitement can also be as simple as transforming everyday, ordinary actions into titillating transactions. Eating, for example, can be used for more than daily nourishment. It can be playful and pampering, too. Consider feeding your partner bite-sized snacks like chocolate or other food aphrodisiacs such as raspberries, blueberries and strawberries. Since the mouth is central to eating and mouths are associated with sex (kissing, licking, sucking), the hand-to-mouth action required for feeding someone else can evoke sensual feelings among those involved.
Prominent sex educator, researcher, and therapist Dr. Laura Berman also regards food as sensual. She promotes sensual eating as a way to bond and be playful. Sensual eating involves focusing on food as a sensual experience by being mindful of the tastes, textures, and scents of the food that is being prepared and consumed.
Exercising is another everyday activity that can enhance sex lives, although busy schedules are often used as an excuse to not exercise. Working out with your partner, then, can be a great way to maintain an exercise regimen and raise your libido. Having an exercise partner can enhance your overall workout since s/he can motivate you to keep going or take your workout to another level. Varying your exercise routines and taking turns to instruct each other on different techniques (e.g. stretching or yoga positions) can mimic or inspire sexual dynamics that can, in turn, become an erotic trigger.
There are also the positive effects working out has on your overall sex drive. According to the Mayo Clinic, "regular physical activity can lead to enhanced arousal for women, and men who exercise regularly are less likely to have problems with erectile dysfunction than are men who don't exercise - especially as they get older." Not to mention, exercise increases energy levels, improves moods, and relieves stress, all of which are helpful for people with a lot on the go.
Kissing, massaging, sensual eating, and exercising rely on partners being together in the same place, which can be a challenge with demanding schedules. For this reason, sexy communicating is a useful way to keep sex top of mind when physical sex isn't a possibility. Sending sexy text messages (or "sexting") is an easy, quick, and discreet way to communicate with your partner during a busy day. Whether you send a sweet message, erotic note, or share a fantasy, you're staying sexually connected. The same can be achieved through emails, chatting, and instant messaging. With technology nowadays, it's easy for most people to take advantage of this kind of kinky communication.
Making time for sex is an integral part of achieving a healthy life balance, which will be unique for every individual. Whenever life's many demands get in the way of having sex, it's important to remember that there are countless ways to still keep life sexy. Touching, talking, and connecting together are all part of a gratifying sex life.