Zooey Deschanel, who seems to live her life as if the movie industry invention "Manic Pixie Dream Girl" were an actual thing, dropped out of university because "my specialness [was] not appreciated in this place".  She further comments on how rough it is to not be appreciated as the unique snowflake she is in an interview with Allure (via Gawker).  Good thing Hollywood is willing to fawn all over her in the manner which she deserves.

Dear Everyone I know Including the Internet,

What gives? 

How I Met Your Mother is freaking brilliant, and you don't bother telling me about it?  You let the show get like five years into their run before it becomes even a blip on my radar?  You have failed me!

Let's all follow city council's lead and do our best to make sure redevelopment of Landsdown gets put on the same fast-track as actually useful public transit in Ottawa!

That way, by the time my grandkids are having children of their own, they just might be able to take a lightrail train-ride to a cool stadium at Landsdown!

Major league sporting events!  Pleasant and affordable public transit!  Coming your way, Ottawa, in 2100!

If there's one thing Michael Bay should know, it's blowing people away. Also, blowing things up. Imagine how explosively upset he must have been when he sat down at his computer to type a grammatically confused email to Paramount re: their sucky publicity campaign for Transformers: Revenge of the Fallen. While his complaint about the trailer might make him seem like a man after my own heart (because seriously, what was stopping them?), this line is my favourite:

"Over the years Jerry Bruckheimer mentored me on event movies - he had a mantra - 'A studio that does not make it an event, will it into an event, thinks the audience will just show up, will always be bitten in the ass.'" 

Only Jerry Bruckheimer and Michael Bay would have a mantra that is easily three times longer than it needs to be and misses the point.

There's something amazing that goes on when they make movie lists over at Foreign Policy. See, right there, the needle came off the record because what in the world does Foreign Policy have to do with cinema, and who in the world is reading Foreign Policy for their cinema advice? They actually got into a little scuffle with sister publication Slate some weeks back over international relations movies, I kid you not. Now they're at it again over The Top 10 Iranian Movies to Netflix This Weekend. I realize that they're being facetious on some level ("It was sarcasm, you guys. Geez!" "Ohhh."), but who is the audience for this list? Who is like, "I would like to better understand Iran, and I have absolutely no plans for this weekend, so I'll add a bunch of movies to my Netflix queue. Two years from now,* when they arrive, I'll be thrilled to learn more." Especially since the list already explains to you what you are supposed to get out of the movies. I hate to sound old fashioned and against my own section, but isn't there a book you could read?

*This is predicated on the idea of an obscenely long queue, much as my own Zip list. It makes whatever movies arrive a constant surprise, which is always fun. If you start out depressed, everything's sort of a pleasant surprise. 

Last week the Ottawa Citizen reported a story about two idiot teenagers who dropped a rock from an overpass onto a car carrying a family, shattering the windshield and injuring the children in the back seat. Guess where one of those idiot teenagers was from.  Yup.  You guessed it.  Osgoode!

Way to continue to live down to everyone's low, low expectations of you, Osgoode.

Given that I thought The Da Vinci Code was one of the worst movies I have ever seen, I find myself taking perverse pleasure in the way the marketing campaign for the prequel, Angels & Demons, is dancing around the uncomfortable fact that it is a sequel to a very terrible film.

The critic quotes they have used to promote the new film thus far specifically mention that it is "much better than The Da Vinci Code in every way!"

Heh. Well sure, my last dump was better than The Da Vinci Code in every way.

By downloading movies you are stealing from the hardworking artists of Hollywood, and more importantly you are single-handedly destroying the movie business. The art form that you love so much and that has enriched your life in so many ways is being utterly destroyed by YOU!!!!

I mean, everyone knows that the work print of X-Men Origins: Wolverine that was leaked onto the internet last month is the reason the film had such an miserable time at the box office last weekend. What did it make? $10 million? $20 million?

See what you have done you evil, evil pirates? You are nothing but common thieves! Why don't you just steal an old lady's purse while you are at it? YOU have RUINED Hollywood!

When I first saw that Crank: High Voltage had a 70% rating on Rotten Tomatoes this morning (it has since fallen to 64%), I was a little surprised. Given that the trailer's approximately 12 hours long and that I've seen it before pretty much every movie since January, I didn't think there was any movie left to see. This afternoon, I read the review on the A.V. Club, and now I'm more confused than ever. A -? A frinkin' minus? They hate everything over there! Apparently the movie's a rousing success on its own gonzo terms. I'm still not convinced I'll ever want to see it. 

The Ottawa Sun is reporting that a set of bagpipes was stolen from a truck parked outside a convenience store in my hometown of Osgoode - a rural community half an hour south of Ottawa.

The instrument belongs to Mr. Bill Stewart, a provincial justice of the peace. He plays in the Ottawa Police Service Pipe band.  The bagpipes are stamped with the Police insignia.

Way to go Osgoode. Way to live up to your reputation of being a hick town full of morons and screw-ups. You make me proud.

Give me a freaking break!

Charging for something that used to be free is not a "green" initiative. It's a corporate initiative meant to increase store profits by reducing the number of plastic bags the company needs to order and by creating two new revenue streams (the charge for plastic bags, along with the new line of Superstore-brand reusable bags).

Somehow I doubt there was a huge public outcry regarding the store's free plastic bags; especially when most people re-use grocery store plastic bags for things like their kitchen garbage can, picking up dog crap in the yard, etc.